It's the spits

Basic manners are one of the foundations of civilised society. They cost nothing but their value is priceless, a bit like a mastercard ad.

One of the most basic manners is keeping your oral fluids in your mouth. It's something that I've managed to do all my life with little difficulty. Why is it then that some people, including an anonymous friend, find it OK to spit on the street? It's disgusting, unnecessary and spreads disease.

I think some people just don't get why you shouldn't do it and others are just too lazy to care. My worst experience was when I was at uni. I was walking through Farringdon and a complete moron turned around and went to spit on the floor. At just that point, I walked past him and his spit landed on my arm. As you can imagine, I wasn't terribly impressed and I don't expect I'm the only person this has happened to.

I have 2 solutions:

1. Don't spit. You can swallow. Stop giggling at the back please.
2. Carry a tissue. People have been blowing their noses in them for decades - you can spit in one too. It's more hygenic than a handkerchief - they're a foul concept.

I include all sportsmen in this too. There's no reason why a footballer couldn't keep a tissue in their sock and spit into in when they feel the need. In fact, I'd get them on board first so that people can see the example they set. There could even be an official tissue supplier to the Premier League - see, it will be hygenic and make money. What could be simpler?